Life these past few weeks has been all about saying goodbye to myself, even as I can feel myself sinking into a new hello.
Seems like I’ve been writing about moving to Kauai on this blog for the past year, and now we are only 2 weeks away, and I find it surreal and strange and beautiful to be living the change instead of thinking about, imagining, and writing about the change.
The change is now, and my chambers echo with its certainty.
There is a last round of goodbyes this week. My practice closes in 3 days. The house is getting emptier and emptier, and it’s as if with every letting go I find myself lighter and lighter, the murky, grueling plod of the past few months changing to a swift upward sprint towards the sun and light.
Manifesting this move has required downward gazing- carefully watching the path in front of me, anticipating any obstacle and challenge that may come up, and adjusting my steps accordingly. But now I find that we are close enough to the end that I am looking up with a profound sense of awe and near completion.
I said I would get to Kauai, and I am doing it.
And I can feel something freeing up inside of me, waving her jubilant octopus arms, rolling with the mermaids of the deep, and getting ready to move in a way she hasn’t ever had space to; I lay in bed this morning talking to the ocean then cast my thoughts out into the trade winds, sending messages of thanks and welcome to the island along their fragrant streams.
Gratitude swims strong and true; I fly with birds of rainbow in my mind; somewhere inside of me a woman lifts her wings ready to rise and soar into newness of being.